Classic Superhero Games That Are Painful To Play Today


We’re in a golden age of superhero games, believe it or not. Yes, the recent Marvel’s Wolverine hasn’t quite landed the way many hoped it would, but Insomniac’s other games, not to mention the likes of Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy, Marvel Rivals, Marvel’s Midnight Suns, and LEGO Batman: Legacy of the Dark Knight, prove that the subgenre is still healthy.

It wasn’t always like this, though, especially before the Batman: Arkham games raised the bar for superheroes in the gaming medium. Indeed, the “bad old days” certainly played host to plenty of underwhelming and mediocre hero-centric games, often manifested as obligatory tie-ins for the films of the era. Unfortunately, even titles that were well-received have crumbled under the test of time, and are nearly unplayable today as a result of dated mechanics, terrible visuals, bad performance, or questionable design choices.

Hulk

Bronze Sandwiched Between Gold

Ang Lee’s 2003 Hulk film gets a bad rap, and I see why. For many, it was a boring, impenetrable movie with none of the joy or excitement associated with superheroes. Perhaps this is why its associated game, which deviates quite significantly from the movie’s plot, was received warmly by many critics at the time, with IGN even granting it an 8/10.

Drag weapons to fill the grid




Drag weapons to fill the grid

EasyMediumHard

Revisiting it today, it’s obvious that the years haven’t been kind to this interactive iteration of Hulk. Despite some interesting ideas, Hulk is ultimately a repetitive and shallow beat-em-up bogged down by various pacing issues courtesy of some ham-fisted Bruce Banner levels. Having been released in the same five-year window as superhero classics like Spider-Man 2 and The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction, Hulk (2003) is hard to revisit, even as a retro throwback.

Spider-Man 3

Could Never Live Up to Its Predecessor

For a long time, the physics-based, charmingly unserious Spider-Man 2 video game adaptation was considered the best 3D superhero game ever made. Its successor, Spider-Man 3, therefore had some big shoes to fill; it didn’t quite rise to the occasion.

Like the Sam Raimi film it was based on, the Spider-Man 3 game boasts the familiar trappings of its beloved predecessor, but without the precision and confidence. Web-swinging is still solid, but considerably slowed down to compensate for more demanding graphics, the art style is muddy, slick, and ugly, and none of Spider-Man 2‘s weaker aspects were appropriately elevated or addressed. The result is a follow-up game that’s boring at best, and frustrating at worst, especially when you remember how much better things could be.

Marvel Ultimate Alliance

Dated Almost Immediately

This is a tough one. Like a lot of people my age, I have many fond childhood memories of playing Marvel Ultimate Alliance with friends. I always remembered the 4-player beat-em-up as an exciting, constantly unfolding, and whimsical arcade experience, until I decided to replay Ultimate Alliance a few years ago. I should have let the game remain a memory.

Ultimate Alliance‘s roster of Marvel heroes is impressive, I’ll give it that, but with woefully underdeveloped combat mechanics and shoddy, improvised-feeling level design, these beloved characters rarely get their due. All Marvel Ultimate Alliance really comes down to, in the end, is button-mashing and joystick-pushing through drab and uncreative levels. There are a lot of great co-op Marvel beat-em-ups (the recent Marvel: Cosmic Invasion comes to mind), so Ultimate Alliance is far from a must-play.

The Amazing Spider-Man

Not So Amazing, Actually

It shouldn’t be surprising that we got a quasi-Arkham City knock-off featuring Spider-Man in 2012, but it’s disappointing nonetheless. The Amazing Spider-Man, which loosely adapts the 2012 film of the same name, follows many of Rocksteady’s combat and stealth fundamentals, but fails to improve upon them with anything new. More importantly, it fails to present them in a way that’s uniquely “Spider-Man.”

More than just derivative, The Amazing Spider-Man is often outright unenjoyable. Something that sticks out to me, all these years later, is the game’s web-swinging. Not only is it not truly physics based (there’s no consideration for where Spidey attaches his web), but the camera also zooms uncomfortably close to Spider-Man as he swings. This can cause motion sickness and disorientation, and it’s just not fun. As far as I’m concerned, bad swinging in a Spider-Man game is basically a cardinal sin.

DC Universe Online

It Takes Superhuman Patience to Put Up With This Gameplay

There are still people who enjoy DC Universe Online, I’m sure, and while I certainly don’t love it, I can understand why others would. There’s an undeniable novelty and charm about creating your own unique DC hero (with a surprisingly robust character creator to boot) and roleplaying as the pupil of an iconic hero (e.g. Superman or Wonder Woman). Traversal, which depends upon your power set, can be quite fun as well, at least for a while. That’s where my praise for DC Universe Online ends, though.

DC Universe Online is still getting updates, but its core gameplay and structure have remained mostly unchanged.

DC Universe Online adopts the same cooldown-driven combat approach as the likes of World of Warcraft, but without the finesse. Most abilities are vague and forgettable, enemy encounters often feel pointless, and there’s a real lack of pomp and drama, which is a problem in a supposedly epic game about superheroes. Looking back on DC Universe Online now, I can’t help but feel like the idea was better than the execution, which is decidedly lacking.









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